That’s the sound of the other shoe dropping on Sarah Palin…
(*fart sound*)
Turns out she’s only in it for the cheddar, duckets, benjamins, scratch, bank, cabbage, *insert some other really wacky silly ass term for money here*
(No way, it that even possible?)
Sarah’s that psycho gift that keeps on giving…
She’s an Olive Garden bottomless bread basket…
According to Levi, she said “how nice it would be to take some of this money people had been offering us…& just run with it, say ‘forget everything else'”
(Levi with lawyer & only ‘black friend’)
I guess ‘Everything else’ was her job and the people of Alaska. Classic…
Dr. Jeans also said, “I think the big deal was the book. That was millions of $”
(Gentleman’s Quagmire)
How noble, how vigilant, how selfless to come forward explaining this detail to all the great people Alaska confused about her resignation. Till we found out he’s “pursuing his own book deal and movie deal while working as a carpenter.”
(No shit!)
The current working book titles are “Jesus Is My Co-Worker”, “This Should Probably Be A Pop-up Book”, & “Harrison Ford Built Shit Too”. The hits…keep…coming…
Pope To Fight In UFC 100 Match
Benedict XVI asked UFC Ceo Dana White to fight in this Saturday nights fight. Pope said, “Gonna kick me some punk ass bitches nuts through the roof of his mouth”…
(Ready to beat some ass)
Dana White agreed saying, “Little dude’s firey. I think he might get killed so I made him sign a waver 1st”. He’ll be matching the Pope up with 6-3 240lb Frank Mir…
(Father, son, & holy shit!)
Mir said, “It’s an honor to fight the pope. I just feel sort of bad since he’s like 89% dust, and will most likely die from a single punch to the face”…
The fight will start at 10pm sharp after an opening prayer…
On A Serious Note
One of my agents informed me that a good agent in the industry has a missing daughter named Justine Martin. She was last seen on Monday in Marietta Georgia when she left from work to go home and get ready for a date with a guy named Sam. Click here. Call Julie Martin(mom) at (404) 350-4145 or the Cobb Country police at (770) 499-3900
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