At the Harry Potter attraction at Universal Islands of Adventure
(Sorry, wrong ride)
It just marked it’s one millionth Butter Beer sold…
Yay! Surely the Hogwarts magic of “Consumerism” is back…
(“To evil!”)
But wait, a sec. It’s sort of odd they’d even keep that stat…
Don’t you think? If they keep that, why not keep “excrement” stats?
Like the 1 million gallon of urine from this Irish Pub
Or, the 500,000th dump taken in that McDonald’s toilet…
Exciting Bucket-List
Everyone has one and I’m no different…
(Noooooice)
Let’s see, right now I have Rubbermaid, OXO, Homer, and Husky…
But I’m thinking of adding a Home-Pro Easy Glide with wheels and ringer
(Slick sexy shit right there)
Meh, really any one will do…
As I dim the light, put on Ashford & Simpson, and scrub the holy fuck outta the floor
Have a weekend!
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