Dog Mauls Owner

December 27th, 2008

Shelly Lipton of Dixon, Illinois was mauled by her normally loving lab named Scooter

silly.jpg(This photo might have done it)

Animal Control handler Steven Hildago said, “Sometimes owners dress their pets up in goofy as shit costumes one too many times, and the animals turn ultra violent on them”. Shelly suffered a broken collar bone, scratches, and was covered in urine. She also had bites on her hand, head, and crotch…

Shelly said she didn’t hold a grudge, but was in no mood to dress him in the near future. Asked if she’d ever do it again she said, “Not a fucking chance. I learned my lesson”…

Fun At The Beach

Some fun things to do at the beach are play catch, boogie board, and splash around wildly in chum-filled waters attracting sharks…

But how about burying your brother in the sand up to his neck?

185075930_f89339dec0.jpg(Huge sand bugs knawing at him)

It’s always fun until some punk kids with whiffle bats are looking for something to hit, or stray dogs come walking around, or you didn’t put sunscreen on him, or it’s high tide…

Not a good idea, unless you really hate your brother…

Off to the beach, have a day!

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