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John Farter, In 3-D…

March 9th, 2012

Sure I’m a 40 year old trapped in the body of 3rd grader

(File photo)

Sure I’m childish, & love fart jokes like fat kids love cake

But I’m sure as hell that John Farter’d be a better movie

Than John Carter. It’s opening today like a front door of

(It stunk)

A house fire. It’s basically like Conan on another planet

The only good thing is Willem Dafoe’s voice for the alien

Aside from that it’s gonna blow like shop vac & a big fan

Best Worst Ways To Break Up With Somebody…

(True)

-Over the loud speaker at Wal-Mart
-During a close baseball game in the 9th inning on the jumbotron
-On any amusement part ride where they’re strapped in
-During the saddest part of any movie(hey they’re crying already)
-Underwater while scuba diving
-Mailed letter
-During Church
-When they’re taking a big shit on the toilet
-While rock climbing & you’re holding their tether
-Have the local Starbucks Barista tell them on their receipt

(13%? Plug in your phone)

Find the best one you’ve ever actual done & e-mail it to me

I’ll post the best one along with their name. Go have some fun

Have a weekend!

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