{"id":629,"date":"2008-12-26T09:41:49","date_gmt":"2008-12-26T15:41:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=629"},"modified":"2008-12-26T09:49:22","modified_gmt":"2008-12-26T15:49:22","slug":"all-i-got-for-christmas-was","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2008\/12\/26\/all-i-got-for-christmas-was\/","title":{"rendered":"All I Got For Christmas Was&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The <em>Package Shark Pro<\/em>. It&#8217;s for opening those hard clear plastic packages.<\/p>\n<p>Only problem is&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/12\/the-package-shark-pro.jpg\" alt=\"the-package-shark-pro.jpg\" height=\"212\" width=\"282\" \/>(Package Shark even <em>sounds<\/em> funny)<\/p>\n<p>I need a <em>Package Shark<\/em>, in order to open my freaking <em>Package Shark&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Dammit, foiled again!<\/p>\n<p><strong>I Fibbed. I Also Got&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The John Candyland board game&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/12\/2085315421_c381df4794.jpg\" alt=\"2085315421_c381df4794.jpg\" height=\"238\" width=\"282\" \/>(<em>Armpit Falls<\/em> was not pretty)<\/p>\n<p>A Shia Pet&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/12\/2085315841_6c11be0718.jpg\" alt=\"2085315841_6c11be0718.jpg\" height=\"304\" width=\"282\" \/>(It&#8217;s Moqtada Al Sadr green)<\/p>\n<p>And Lawn Dart Tag&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/12\/2086100064_590301f08e.jpg\" alt=\"2086100064_590301f08e.jpg\" height=\"276\" width=\"281\" \/>(Extra points if you aim for the heart)<\/p>\n<p>Big thanks to Flickrs <em>yourshorter<\/em> for the shots. Have a day!<\/p>\n<div id=\"bolge-619643704\" class=\"bolge-after-content bolge-entity-placement\"><ins class=\"adbladeads\" data-cid=\"44284-1271501652\" data-host=\"web.adblade.com\" data-tag-type=\"4\" data-protocol=\"https\" style=\"display:none\"><\/div><br style=\"clear: both; display: block; float: none;\"\/>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Package Shark Pro. It&#8217;s for opening those hard clear plastic packages. Only problem is&#8230; (Package Shark even sounds funny) I need a Package Shark, in order to open my freaking Package Shark&#8230; Dammit, foiled again! I Fibbed. I Also Got&#8230; The John Candyland board game&#8230; (Armpit Falls was not pretty) A Shia Pet&#8230; (It&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-629","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news-comedy-satire"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/629","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=629"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/629\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=629"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=629"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=629"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}