{"id":5181,"date":"2011-08-18T09:38:02","date_gmt":"2011-08-18T15:38:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=5181"},"modified":"2011-08-18T09:38:30","modified_gmt":"2011-08-18T15:38:30","slug":"the-stock-market-is-touchier-than","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2011\/08\/18\/the-stock-market-is-touchier-than\/","title":{"rendered":"The Stock Market Is Touchier Than…"},"content":{"rendered":"

-A pregnant mom carrying triplets one week before delivery
\n-A sexual predator with a victim in his unmarked white van
\n-Your 6th grade teacher after a night of binge drinking
\n-A truck driver after a sleepless week up on pep pills
\n-A loan officer when you back date your payments a month earlier
\n-A TSA security guard to literally everyone
\n-Gopher on the original Love Boat
\n-The Jewish leaders were against Jesus in the Bible
\n-Any person you happen to be standing behind of at the DMV<\/p>\n

\"\"(Feining fear, Doug smells his fart)<\/p>\n

Take your pick. I liked #3 best, but you decide…<\/p>\n

It dropped faster than pants at a nudest colony<\/p>\n

\"\"(Zong)<\/p>\n

Almost 500 points at one time during the trading day<\/p>\n

Meh, like I said, you watch. Once football season starts, all is forgiven<\/p>\n

\"\"(He said not to panic)<\/p>\n

It’ll soar soon, because of the NFL Sunday ticket, AKA “Man-Crack”<\/p>\n

Letterman Now A Jihad Target<\/strong><\/p>\n

Wait, now what what with the what what?<\/p>\n

Maybe the few violent militant Muslims didn’t get a dictionary<\/p>\n

But comedian means we makes jokes about EVERYONE<\/p>\n

\"\"(Thanks for free new material)<\/p>\n

If we didn’t, we’d be biased, stupid, & irrelevant. You know, like FOX News<\/p>\n

ZING<\/p>\n

In a Muslim on-line forum it turns out someone didn’t like his “drone” joke<\/p>\n

The guy wrote his name, Al-Basrawi, and then said this:<\/p>\n

“Is there not among you a Sayyid Nosair al-Mairi…<\/p>\n

to cut the tongue of this lowly Jew and shut it forever?”<\/p>\n

\"\"(I love Scotland)<\/p>\n

Classy! Something to think about. If, & it’s a big IF<\/p>\n

But IF you find yourself being an evil terrorist plotting death to America<\/p>\n

Maybe don’t USE YOUR REAL NAME ON-LINE<\/p>\n

\"\"(File photo of him)<\/p>\n

Also, you do know people can trace IP addresses directly to you<\/p>\n

Thankfully militants are not only wrong, violent, & hateful. Turns out<\/p>\n

\"\"(Stupid people)<\/p>\n

They’re also really really really really really fucking stupid<\/p>\n

Have a day!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

-A pregnant mom carrying triplets one week before delivery -A sexual predator with a victim in his unmarked white van -Your 6th grade teacher after a night of binge drinking -A truck driver after a sleepless week up on pep pills -A loan officer when you back date your payments a month earlier -A TSA […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5181"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5197,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions\/5197"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5181"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5181"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5181"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}