{"id":5160,"date":"2011-08-17T13:43:08","date_gmt":"2011-08-17T19:43:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=5160"},"modified":"2011-08-17T13:43:08","modified_gmt":"2011-08-17T19:43:08","slug":"rick-perry-now-loves-america","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2011\/08\/17\/rick-perry-now-loves-america\/","title":{"rendered":"Rick Perry Now Loves America…"},"content":{"rendered":"

He wants to lay us down and make sweet angry Texas love to us<\/p>\n

\"\"(“Just you & me baby!”)<\/p>\n

This comes after two years ago when he hated us, & tried to dump us<\/p>\n

You remember, when he wanted to “Secede from the US”?<\/p>\n

\"\"(Rick Perry’s USA)<\/p>\n

I guess he has a Brokeback Mountain relationship with us<\/p>\n

He just can’t quit us, but at the same time can’t accept he’s gay<\/p>\n

And if he finally does, he’ll have to pray the gay out of himself<\/p>\n

It’s also funny he thinks Ben Bernanke printing more $ is “treasonous”<\/p>\n

\"\"(You go now, no USA for you!)<\/p>\n

The guy is a few clowns short of a full circus, & heavy on the “cowboy”<\/p>\n

I imagine a campaign ad of his like this coming soon:<\/p>\n

*Cue sunset across a Texas ranch, as it pans to Rick*<\/p>\n

(He has a big hat, belt buckle, & his foot on a bail of hay<\/p>\n

with a big piece of straw coming out of his mouth<\/p>\n

He is slowly polishing his gun while wincing at the sunrise)<\/p>\n

\"\"(Vote for me, or I shoot ya)<\/p>\n

VO: Some men rise at dawn, while others sleep all day<\/p>\n

But Rick Perry never sleeps, EVER! That’s Rick Perry<\/p>\n

He stays up protecting his ranch, & polishing his gun<\/p>\n

And he wants to do that everyday for lady America<\/p>\n

By being our next President…instead of that filthy Kenyan ni##er<\/p>\n

Rick Perry: I’m rick Perry, and I approve this message<\/p>\n

\"\"(He also approves this)<\/p>\n

The guy is nuttier than squirrel shit, but that’s America baby<\/p>\n

Apple Needs To Come Out…<\/strong><\/p>\n

With the ijob. Think about it…<\/p>\n

People might buy it if they actually had $<\/p>\n

\"\"(It’d work, if you could)<\/p>\n

Either that or the ihandjob<\/p>\n

But then Apple will be cutting in on the worlds oldest profession<\/p>\n

Meh, never stopped em before<\/p>\n

Michelle Bachmann Wishes Elvis “Happy Birthday”<\/strong><\/p>\n

On the anniversary of his death…<\/p>\n

\"\"(Oh jeeeez)<\/p>\n

This women is dumber than a sack of wet hammers<\/p>\n

She makes more obvious mistakes than a blind carpenter<\/p>\n

It’s not the mistakes, but the “I didn’t make one, your ears heard it wrong”<\/p>\n

\"\"(No mistakes here)<\/p>\n

Silly hubris follow up that always makes it five times as bad<\/p>\n

But, she’s one snappy dresser, so she must be a Republican<\/p>\n

Have a day!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

He wants to lay us down and make sweet angry Texas love to us (“Just you & me baby!”) This comes after two years ago when he hated us, & tried to dump us You remember, when he wanted to “Secede from the US”? (Rick Perry’s USA) I guess he has a Brokeback Mountain relationship […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5160"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5160"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5160\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5180,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5160\/revisions\/5180"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5160"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5160"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5160"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}