{"id":3593,"date":"2011-01-26T11:47:51","date_gmt":"2011-01-26T17:47:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=3593"},"modified":"2011-01-28T09:06:47","modified_gmt":"2011-01-28T15:06:47","slug":"state-of-the-tanion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2011\/01\/26\/state-of-the-tanion\/","title":{"rendered":"State Of The Tanion…"},"content":{"rendered":"

Was it just me, or did the 3 shot look like…<\/p>\n

\"sotu-3-shot.jpg\"(Light, darker, darkest)<\/p>\n

It was a new “Tan-O-Meter”<\/em> from left to right<\/p>\n

“Go from 1 to 10 in three easy steps”<\/p>\n

Obama said, “We do big things”<\/p>\n

Ah yes, the ol’ “Penis Swinging State Of The Union” tone…<\/p>\n

It was right, needed, but really booooooring as all balls…<\/p>\n

Then Republican Paul Ryan from Wisconsin tried his presidential push<\/p>\n

\"bachmann_ryan.jpg\"(Dumber & Dumb)<\/p>\n

With the usual “rebuttal” which landed like a squeaking fart<\/p>\n

Screaming “Smaller gumberment”, and “end gumberment spending” without dealing with the budget shortages lower taxes on the top 3% cause makes it an impossible argument. If you can’t address CBO shortage #’ers, your’re pissing in the wind<\/p>\n

And all you’ll do is get wet…<\/p>\n

Ask Republicans “What does “Less gumberment” mean? Which programs are cut?”<\/p>\n

They don’t have an answer right now, because they voted YES to it under Bush<\/p>\n

They might scream, “Entitlement spending”(Unemployment)” or “Social Security”<\/p>\n

There goes your poor and senior votes douche clowns…<\/p>\n

Yes, take $ from the jobless, that’ll get our economy going<\/p>\n

\"paul-ryan-lying-sandwich.jpg\"(My lying sandwich is this big)<\/p>\n

All while forgetting “Tax cuts for the top 3%” is also spending…<\/p>\n

Paul, you’ve been in office since 1998<\/p>\n

Shall we see your “Gumberment spending record under Bush”<\/a>?<\/p>\n

Not good bud. It’s like a philanderer chastising a cheating husband…<\/p>\n

Stepped On A Pop Top, Did A Face Plant Flop…<\/strong><\/p>\n

Poor Jimmy Buffet, the younger rabble rouser son of billionaire Warren Buffett<\/p>\n

\"warren-buffett-monster-ping-pong-paddle.jpg\"(Holy shit, I’m shrinking)<\/p>\n

Sadly fell face first off the stage in Australia and hit his head<\/p>\n

Buffet’s manager then took the stage and urged fans to leave the auditorium<\/p>\n

\"jimmy-buffet.jpg\"(Stage Dive!)<\/p>\n

In an orderly “Fins to the left, Fins to the right” fashion…<\/p>\n

Yes, I’m aware these are horrible, silly, stupid jokes<\/p>\n

\"jimmy-buffet-mug.jpg\"(Hi-lar-ious)<\/p>\n

So here are more titles to this I had but didn’t use:<\/p>\n

-Cheese Burgers On Face Plant Nice
\n-Blew Out A Flip Flop
\n-Face Plant Away Again In Margaritaville
\n-Star Fell On Australia
\n-Son Of Stage Sailor<\/p>\n

Gods speed Jimmy, and rest your gentle Parrot Head…<\/p>\n

Have a day!<\/p>\n

<\/div>
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Was it just me, or did the 3 shot look like… (Light, darker, darkest) It was a new “Tan-O-Meter” from left to right “Go from 1 to 10 in three easy steps” Obama said, “We do big things” Ah yes, the ol’ “Penis Swinging State Of The Union” tone… It was right, needed, but really […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3593","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news-comedy-satire"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3593","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3593"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3593\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3593"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3593"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3593"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}