{"id":3250,"date":"2010-09-23T09:59:42","date_gmt":"2010-09-23T15:59:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=3250"},"modified":"2010-09-23T09:59:42","modified_gmt":"2010-09-23T15:59:42","slug":"garden-gnomes-arent-to-be-trusted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2010\/09\/23\/garden-gnomes-arent-to-be-trusted\/","title":{"rendered":"Garden Gnomes Aren&#8217;t To Be Trusted"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s science fact&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/09\/garden-gnome-pipe-9r.jpg\" alt=\"garden-gnome-pipe-9r.jpg\" height=\"441\" width=\"291\" \/>(I&#8217;m so cute an innocent)<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;ve got all night to plot some serious shit while we&#8217;re sleeping<\/p>\n<p>Then when we wake up, oh look, they&#8217;ve got that confidant smile on their face<\/p>\n<p>Cause they did something really bad<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/09\/gnome-news.jpg\" alt=\"gnome-news.jpg\" height=\"242\" width=\"293\" \/>(Oh, I remember that)<\/p>\n<p>When your local bank gets robbed, but no one is caught on camera&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Garden Gnomes did it<\/p>\n<p>When stuff around your house goes missing for days&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Garden Gnomes did it<\/p>\n<p>When your milk and other things in the refrigerator go bad<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/09\/gnome-stabbed.jpg\" alt=\"gnome-stabbed.jpg\" height=\"222\" width=\"295\" \/>(They even rub each other out)<\/p>\n<p>Well, actually that&#8217;s you being a lazy fucker not checking expiration dates<\/p>\n<p>But you can bet your sweet ass the Garden Gnomes were laughing<\/p>\n<p>Have a day!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s science fact&#8230; (I&#8217;m so cute an innocent) They&#8217;ve got all night to plot some serious shit while we&#8217;re sleeping Then when we wake up, oh look, they&#8217;ve got that confidant smile on their face Cause they did something really bad (Oh, I remember that) When your local bank gets robbed, but no one is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3250"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3250"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3250\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3250"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3250"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3250"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}