{"id":1094,"date":"2009-04-09T10:18:53","date_gmt":"2009-04-09T16:18:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=1094"},"modified":"2009-04-09T11:28:21","modified_gmt":"2009-04-09T17:28:21","slug":"boogers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2009\/04\/09\/boogers\/","title":{"rendered":"Boogers!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>What is it about boogers? We scavenge around in our nose like going through a suit case on vacation looking for the perfect shirt. Bingo, we find it, &amp; out it comes&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/garbage-pail-kids.jpg\" style=\"width: 225px; height: 219px\" alt=\"garbage-pail-kids.jpg\" \/>(Pick a winner buddy)<\/p>\n<p>Our eyes light up as if we&#8217;ve just seen a long lost friend across the room&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Now comes the most difficult part&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>What to do with this magical nostril treasure we&#8217;ve unearthed? First we start rolling it around while thinking, &#8220;What next? Do I wipe it under the desk? No, I can&#8217;t place it where so many other lower grade boogers have gone. For out of all the wonderful selections of crunchy, gooey, thick, or hard nose treats, I specifically choose <em>you<\/em> from my sniffing storage locker. You&#8217;re special. You will go in my <em>Booger Jar<\/em>!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/booger-jar.jpg\" style=\"width: 224px; height: 285px\" alt=\"booger-jar.jpg\" \/>(Nice craftsmanship!)<\/p>\n<p>Everyone keeps a booger jar. Everyone&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>But what happens to boogers if we just throw them on the ground?<\/p>\n<p>Do they eventually decompose?<\/p>\n<p>These and many more mysteries will continue to plague us forever&#8230;<br \/>\n<strong><br \/>\nThe Uptight Right&#8230;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You lost, get over it&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I heard the GOP even has a new logo to appeal to younger voters. He&#8217;s called <em>&#8220;Flippy&#8221;<\/em> the hip-hop urban elephant who says, &#8220;When yous vote Republican, yous da man!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/flippy-gop-logo.jpeg\" alt=\"flippy-gop-logo.jpeg\" height=\"229\" width=\"182\" \/>(Sit and spin)<\/p>\n<p>Hannity, Beck, O&#8217;Reilly, Dick Morris, and Michelle &#8220;Bachmann Tunner Loonydrive&#8221; have lost it. Only thing is that implies they had it in the first place which they didn&#8217;t. Here are quotes I&#8217;ve seen lately, about how the country has totally changed in three months from December 08 to today&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Bachmann &#8211; &#8220;American&#8217;s have to suit up, &amp; realize what&#8217;s at stake right now. We have to fight for freedom, &amp; the future of our country&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Bachmann &#8211; &#8220;This isn&#8217;t a game. This is our very freedom, we&#8217;ve had 230 years of a continuous freedom. That every generation had ceded to the next generation. This may be the time, when that link breaks.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Hannity &#8211; &#8220;If conservatism doesn&#8217;t win the day, tyranny will rule&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Beck &#8211; &#8220;We don&#8217;t even understand freedom anymore. We are a country that is headed toward socialism, totalitarianism, beyond your wildest imagination.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The &#8220;freaks&#8221; do come out at night&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Shit sakes, I guess when Bush handed out bailout money in August is was &#8220;American&#8221;. I didn&#8217;t hear &#8220;Socialism!&#8221;. NOW when Obama does it? Get your fucking guns, start a war at home, and run for the hills ma kettle!<\/p>\n<p>Socialism is the new &#8220;Commie&#8221;&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s insane. Deal with it, you lost an election because you&#8217;re <em>so<\/em> out of touch with normal American voters. What&#8217;s you plan? Let&#8217;s go even &#8220;crazier&#8221;. They&#8217;re still trying the same &#8220;character attack&#8221; style from 04&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/jesus-ad.jpg\" alt=\"jesus-ad.jpg\" height=\"437\" width=\"333\" \/>(Smooth!)<\/p>\n<p>How exactly does speech inciting lunatic action make America Better?<\/p>\n<p>Have a day!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is it about boogers? We scavenge around in our nose like going through a suit case on vacation looking for the perfect shirt. Bingo, we find it, &amp; out it comes&#8230; (Pick a winner buddy) Our eyes light up as if we&#8217;ve just seen a long lost friend across the room&#8230; Now comes the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1094"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1094"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1094\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1094"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1094"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1094"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}