{"id":1073,"date":"2009-04-06T10:22:36","date_gmt":"2009-04-06T16:22:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/?p=1073"},"modified":"2009-04-06T12:43:18","modified_gmt":"2009-04-06T18:43:18","slug":"twitter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/2009\/04\/06\/twitter\/","title":{"rendered":"Twitter…"},"content":{"rendered":"

To Twitter or not, that<\/em> is the question…<\/p>\n

\"twitter-shades.jpg\"(“Shades” twitters! Be like “Shades”)<\/p>\n

I generally avoid things that rhyme with the words “bitter”, “quitter”, or “shitter”…<\/p>\n

That’s why I don’t purchase “Gritty kitty litter from a knitter baby sitter”…<\/p>\n

Twitter asks the user to type in 140 characters into a “tweet” to let people know what you’re doing, where you’re at, or how your super gay assed blue berry scone tastes…<\/p>\n

\"twitter-button.jpg\"(Sounds like admitting you masturbate)<\/p>\n

Here’s my take. People using Twitter as a self indulgent spank session are twunts<\/em>…<\/p>\n

But how can we tell the difference John?<\/p>\n

Glad you asked. There are three things that give it away…<\/p>\n

1) Silly handles like RazorBladez, SundaySlutwhore, or BallPunchFart
\n2) When a tweet starts off with “So…”
\n3) They’re huge douche puppets<\/p>\n

One word, tone…<\/p>\n

When it’s honest reactions or free flowing exchange on the screen, it’s fun…<\/p>\n

\"twitter-cartoon.jpg\"(Keep it together my tweet)<\/p>\n

When not, it reads like an 8th grade comment in a yearbook from 1986 with “Stay sweet”, “See ya round this summer”, or “Again, sorry I fucked your dog”<\/p>\n

When celebrities\/people you admire “tweet”, and it geniunly feels like they’re talking to a close friend, this<\/em> is a good thing. Twitter removes the “filter” and I see a real connection with fans\/friends as a good thing. Hopefully it stays that way. But, for every good thing, we also have a Kylee, Diamond or Tayla from Columbus, OH tweeting about her new Juicy Jeans that make her ass look like a hat…<\/p>\n

Maybe since I don’t use it, you’ll label me “fear of the unknown guy” and rightly so…<\/p>\n

\"jon-stweart-twistter.jpg\"(Fist shaker, memory maker)<\/p>\n

While standing in line in the mens room, I heard two business guys pissing ahead of me, when one said, “Boy Kent(I don’t remember his name, but it was something Office Spacey like that), I knew once you mentioned Twitter in the meeting, they’d love<\/em> it”<\/p>\n

Sorry, Kent, not today…<\/p>\n

Baseball season starts today, so lace em up, and lay some wood. Well, that is except for the Chicago White Sox because it’s 35 degrees and snowing today. Mother Nature is acting like one bi-polar bitch lately…<\/p>\n

\"behond-bitch.gif\"(True dat)<\/p>\n

Who pissed in her coffee?<\/p>\n

Have a day…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

To Twitter or not, that is the question… (“Shades” twitters! Be like “Shades”) I generally avoid things that rhyme with the words “bitter”, “quitter”, or “shitter”… That’s why I don’t purchase “Gritty kitty litter from a knitter baby sitter”… Twitter asks the user to type in 140 characters into a “tweet” to let people know […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1073"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1073"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1073\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bolgernow.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}