His press conference was almost like a bizarre comedy sketch

All you needed under it was an erratic Theremin score playing


Shit, you could actually redo the whole thing word for word

Dress Cain & his silly lawyer in big silly clown costumes

Then the reporters should be dressed as huge rats with pens

He tripled down on stupid, right on que, as we knew he would

(I work the nipples)

The entire thing was like Eddie Murphy’s “It wasn’t me” bit

What does FOX news think about all this? Oh you know them

They’re trying to discredit the women, sling mud, lie, & repeat it

Sure, they could take the facts we have & then ask Cain questions


But that’s stupid journalism only libtards do. Fuck that gay shit

Sit back, grab some popcorn, & enjoy the majesty of his words:

“Well, a businessman man by the name of Herman Cain stepped forward.
I know by the people we talked with that’s what they want. We are not
going to allow Washington to deny me or the opportunity to represent
this great nation…I’m doing this for the American people & for the children
& the grandchildren…these anonymous allegations are false & now the
Democratic machine have brought forth a troubled woman to make false
accusations, many of which exceed common sense & certainly the standards
of decency in America…
I have never acted inappropriately with anyone,
period. It simply did not happen…I don’t even know who this woman is”

Ok, two things about this. One, if you’re only running for president

Because of the children, and grandchildren. They want you to stop

(Then push her head down)

Mostly since even they know that China already has nuclear weapons

And your 999 plan is simply a silly reverse Robin Hood flat tax

Secondly, it’s not “Washington politics” denying you the presidency

It’s your contradictions, lies, & irrational words denying you this

(Getting warm?)

Also, “Washington Politics” are the entire primary electoral process

If you don’t like that, you might not want to get in the race…

It’d be like, oh I don’t know, a guy who wants to be a surgeon;

But really hates cutting skin & can’t stand the sight of blood

(Ghaaa, blood)

Or like a great pizza maker; who wont touch cheese, sauce, or dough

Here’s the deal Herman. All the women will come forward

You can book it. But why? These are registered TP Republicans

Who are seriously pissed off at a guy seeking the highest office

(Cum clean)

Going on national TV nightly saying “I never harassed anyone”

When they sit there knowing that you did it to them. It’s your lies

But according to Cain, “I don’t even know who this woman is”

Funny thing about that. One month ago at TeaCon in Chicago

Amy Jacobson witnessed Sharon cut her in line going directly to Cain

Amy, who I know personally, was in line waiting to get a photo w/Cain

(And she did)

She said they hugged, & Sharon sternly had his ear for 3 minutes

According to Jacobs seeing this in front of her, it looked tense

Just like his entire campaign. He’s a true “Washington outsider”

In fact so much so that’s he’s going to be left out of it all together

Fork, done, and toast former Mr. Restaurant. Corzine FU tomorrow

Have a day!


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