Archive for May, 2011

Right here for you… (Wow, great parenting) It makes a lot of sense when you think about it… By “a lot” I mean “for a real creepy violent”, and by “of sense” I mean “crime” Oh, Turns Out… Mike I “Heart” Huckabee’s won’t run for the Republican presidential nomination (Don’t remember it? Neither do I) […]

Ever Notice…

May 11th, 2011

People trying to find out a dogs name never speak to the owners? (“My name is Stop It“) They actually look down & ask the fu#king dog “Well, what’s your name?” As if it’s going to suddenly answer them… Obama’s Approval Rate Hits 60% Gee, I wonder why? Oh, it’s because of his Final Four […]

Shoes, chocolate, crack, & “Apocalyptic Zombie Invasion Shelters” (No windows, nice touch) I mean, how many “Apocalyptic Zombie Invasion Shelters” reps bother you? No harassing calls at night, no door-to-door. But I will say, watch out for Dave (How bout a nice Zombie shelter duplex?) If it’s the end of the month and he didn’t […]

Nice Mothers Day Cards

May 9th, 2011

Happy cheerful one’s like: (How sweet!) Or this lil’ gem: (True) And finally this heartfelt winner here: (Can you reimburse for therapy?) So touching, so loving… The Great “Fence” Of Arizona Turns out Arizona still wants to build a “great fence” to keep out filthy Mexicans But sadly they have no $ for it. But […]

Is Steve Simon…

May 6th, 2011

Paul Simon’s younger cooler brother? (Art: “Why you gotta be a dick?”) Nawwwwwwwww. He’s the one that didn’t tell Garfunkel to “suck it” He’s a Minnesota house committee Democrat sticking up for equality After some wanted to put a measure on the ballot to “Ban gay marriage” Watch here So here’s to you Mr. Robinson […]

It’s Sinko De Mayo

May 5th, 2011

In 1912 the Hellmann’s Mayonnaise Company shipped 12,000 jars from England to Vera Cruz, Mexico. On the first leg of the journey, it was cargo on the Titanic which sunk. This devastated Mexicans looking to zest up their rat sandwiches… (Sink sandwiches!) From then on it was known as Sinko De Mayo… Another little slice […]

a dozens Donuts. Lots of holes in em (Yes, & this) They’re like the loose screws on carny rides Fun to look at, but you won’t go near em for safety reasons They think Bin Laden ISN’T dead (Liars!) Can’t tell which is worse: That these nut jobs demand to SEE the body of Bin […]

FOX News Headline Fail

May 3rd, 2011

Oh yes, leave it to FOX (Really dipshit, you sure about that?) Basic audience=understands the mistake, and understands why it’s on FOX FOX audience=confused & angry wondering why the POTUS is somehow still alive FOX has a new slogan: “Making Obvious Mistakes That Stoke The Fears Of Old White Voters Since 1996” (Nice logo) It’s […]

“Hey turds, did I miss anything big this weekend?” (Check me out suckas!) Osama Bin Laden is dead If you didn’t hear, the rock you live under is too heavy and stops sound (Wrong “Rock”) Now, I’m not saying it’s odd to celebrate the death of someone… But it’s sort of odd to celebrate the […]

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