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The VP Turd Pass

April 24th, 2012

Every Republican is passing on the nomination like gas after thick chili

They’re a shitty NFL team on third down…they’re always gonna pass…

Why? Because what would your answer be to the question: “Hey you, do

(No thanks)

You wanna to join me in running a hate campaign for racists & morons to

Paint Obama as evil while most likely ruining our political careers in the

Process? Wait, don’t answer, I’ll throw in a set of Ginsu Steak Knives…”

(Use the force)

Rubio, passed. As did Condi Rice, & Jeb Bush, & Nikki Haley, & Christie

It’s like Musical Turds. A big turd is being tossed around in the air, but…

(Never played that)

The music will have to stop at some point. And the person left holding it

Will now be the pick. Who will that be? My best guess is the guy who was

Already in the race running this stupid shit & failing at it. Rick Santorum

The only other super douche ballsy enough to run that kind of campaign

Would be young Paul Ryan from Wisconsin. Because he clearly doesn’t

(I beat old folks with this)

Give a shit about his political future with his recent budget that cuts the

Social Programs for seniors, & all others to the bone. He’s already up Shit

Creek using his tie as a paddle. Might as well jump in, the water is cool…

The last try would be Bobby Jindal, but at that point, it’s utter desperation

It all spells one thing. This fall election will be one of the nastiest, meanest

(Sad, but true)

Hateful political spectacles we’ve ever witnessed in our lifetime. The GOP

Can’t run on what they’d do, cause we’re still recovering from what they’ve

Done to us from 00-08. Hell Biden was a good pick, but he always sticks

His shoe in his mouth so often it’s how he ties his shoes nowadays. It’s all

free material for you & me. Buckle up America, we are in for one silly ride…

Why Burpee’s Are Better Than Herpes

After you’re done with the burpee’s, it goes away. Can’t really say the same

About the ol Herpes. Also, one hurts for a little bit, but all helps in the long

(But why?)

Haul. The other just burns like a MF’er when you piss. The only redeeming

Thing about Herpes is if something though you were a virgin, it proves your

(Lip herpes)

Not. But then again, now no one ever wants to sleep with you again, so it’s a

Double burn. Burpee’s might not be popular, but they’re better than Herpes

Have a day!

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